Happy Birthday
by Mileena
Summary: It's a JiMmy story, written for a friend. One sided slash. Hoorah


Happy Birthday  
  
by Mileena  
  
A/N I don't own JiMmy...Jhonen Does (although he isn't the nicest of owners) jhonen is good, but he is a little mean, and so are Mmy haters, so if you happen to hate JiMmy, fuck off. I don't like you. (read disguised as your friends....especially if you hate Mmy) Yes...this is Dedicated to a person I know on Deviant Art...her name is Sluggie, and she is the best JiMmy Artist evers. WOo!  
  
Happy Birthday To Me  
  
It's Saturday, and it's ungodly early. I can't remember ever being awake at this time, but I am now.   
  
Maybe it's because I'm all alone, maybe it's because its my birthday.  
  
Maybe it's because I'm without you.  
  
The sunrise is beautiful, I do have to admit that, I only so often see the sun setting, and it's own beauty of the nightlife.  
  
Are all beginnings as beautiful as th is?  
  
No.  
  
Not for me.   
  
You searched out to be cold, to be emotionless, and yet you still call and pine over that stupid girl.  
  
That stupid girl that sent cops to see you, who cringes and gets sick at the thought of your whole existance. Well, not anymore, she won't be painting ever again, she won't even be seeing that friend of hers. She's gone forever.  
  
And you have nothing to pine over.  
  
So I thought.  
  
You pine over her loss, and it made me so sick. I had no choice, and in the end, if I couldn't have you...no one could.   
  
But now, I am so sick of this feeling. I have always had this empty feeling, it has always been there but now...  
  
Now....it just burns and hits me at every turn. I can't stand it. And so what is the last thing I should do?  
  
Blow out the candles.  
  
Say goodbye to everything that was once his. Give you a proper burial with wooden cross, saying "in loving memory" and kill my ownself.  
  
Because, Nny, I always thought "I would kill myself for you...but it looks like I would have to kill you for myself."  
  
and thats what I had to do.  
  
Freeing you from this world, well maybe some good will come of this.  
  
For so long now, in my dreams I have seen pools of blues and blacks, and this soft hue of green. And I can't stand to be lonely without you.   
  
My Everything.  
  
I will read your Die-Ary as your birthday gift to me, and I will have learned everything that tormented you, and I will be proud of myself for doing what I did to you.   
  
Because you were so steeped in misery, that there really was no other way out for you.  
  
But in the end, it gets all dreary, because your words are clouded and emotional, and it gets too hard for me to read.  
  
I sit on the couch that you more than likely spent many sleepless nights, and I will wander over to where you were constructing your newest Noodle Boy Comic.   
  
You were a thing of beauty, and everything about you I killed in one painfully slow movement. I cannot die here, because it was touched by your hands, your beautiful hands. And now, I don't even deserve to be in the same universe that you were once in. I tainted it.  
  
There is a bridge outside of town, and since I can't swim, it will be most easiest. I glance at 777 one last time, and everything around it. Little eyes next door staring me down....and I remember how you were such a wonderful father type figure in his presence. Everyone thought, "well at least there is some good in him" and they never knew.  
  
They never knew our pain.   
  
I walk on until I pass out, it's been forever since I was able to sleep, and now that I know this world is without you, it will be even harder.  
  
You were my everything, whether you acknowledged it or not.  
  
When I wake again, its dark, and I'm confused, yet comfortable. I know what I must do.  
  
The water under the bridge is dark, and an endless void. It's not too clear when the actuall darkness stops, and the water begins. I look over and see a couple under the lamp-post. What they are doing on this bridge is beyond me, but they smile and giggle and carry on, They are in love, and I smile at their happiness, but It will never be the same for me again.  
  
I fall. The air feels good, but it was for a quick second before the raging water gets to me, and I'm falling down still, the water burns, and pools of liquid blacks and blues swim around me.  
  
My Dream.  
  
I knew it would end this way.  
  
I faintly make out your eyes, and the hurt in them, but then I feel like I'm being pulled up, and I fight against it. I want to go down, I don't deserve to go up.  
  
I scream when I hit the surface, but I'm dragged to the side, to some rocks and sand. I curse and scream before I look into their eyes.  
  
The love filled eyes that I had seen above. They came to my rescue?  
  
They tell me their names, and they have beautiful names. They ask me mine, and sadly I tell them. They look at me hurt, as if they couldn't believe I had just killed myself, but they are filled with love, and when they are staring at me with their matching green eyes, I can fill it pulsate inside. It's beautiful.  
  
I am drawn to these people, and they tell me they want me to stay with them. They can give me love that I could never have found.  
  
Maybe some good will come of this.  
  
I stare at the stars, and they make a vision of you, and I silently cry, these people pet my head and tell me it's gonna be allright.  
  
And I know it will 


End file.
